Dear Ezra

As your "birth day" draws near, I'm feeling nostalgic about our time together over the last 9 months. I remember so sweetly the day we took not one, but five pregnancy tests to confirm what we already knew. I remember kneeling at the alter Easter Sunday praying about the possibility of you and feeling in my heart our prayer already answered. We stopped to buy a test, I took it, I came running out with a smile on my face. Your daddy and I loaded up your puppy brothers and went back for more tests. All YES! Later that evening Daddy held mommy as she cried her eyes out at the amazingness of knowing that already you were growing inside of me.

Two days later, mommy celebrated her 26th birthday. We joke that Daddy gave me you as the best birthday present ever! We called your grandparents. Nana cried and starred at us. Oma and Opa's eyes grew big! Friends and family celebrated and rejoiced at the news.

We had to wait 12 weeks before we heard your heartbeat. Hearing the sound, daddy and mommy grabbed each other's hands and just said a prayer of thanksgiving. Your heart beating was the most beautiful sound. Seeing you move on the sonogram was life changing, overwhelming, captivating!

At 16 weeks we had a scare on a bad lab test. Knowing that you could be affected by my immunity to rubella caused us to fully rely on the goodness and faithfulness of God. He brought us through our fear and we know that on the day we meet you, He will have claimed victory over your health.

At 17 weeks, Daddy and mommy needed to get out of Midland, so we drove two hours to Lubbock just to get away. On the way home, mommy's stomach hurt so bad. Once at home again, we laid in bed and YOU KICKED! You moved and I knew it was YOU! Our sweet boy! Every time you moved I would grab your dad's hand, put it on my stomach, and then you would calm down. You were elusive to your dad for a few more weeks. At this point we always called you "our little one."

At 20 weeks, on your dad's 29th birthday, we had a 3d/4d ultrasound. We saw you move! We saw you touch your toes, give us a thumbs up and wiggle and giggle. We also DIDN'T see rubella!! Praise God!

At 21 weeks we opened a box on the beach on Camano and celebrated our SON! Blue balloons flew into the sky and daddy and mommy said another prayer of Thanksgiving for our baby boy. Your name, Ezra Liam Fekkes, written in the sand and on our hearts. I wanted a boy! I'm so thankful for you.

As we neared 29 weeks, my fears about losing you evaporated! You were viable! We were thankful!

At 32 weeks, Mommy took you to Georgia for time with friends and family. You were rubbed like Buddha by your many aunts and your cousin Caleb. You received so many beautiful gifts and you ate really good Mexican food! Also at this point, we discovered an issue with mommy's sugar. But, like everything else, we gave it to God. You, sweet boy, are going to be perfect on your birth day.

Now, at 37 weeks and 5 days pregnant, I'm looking back and remembering each day with you. Despite months of morning sickness, I wouldn't trade a single day with you. I've loved having you grow, move, kick and turn inside of me. I'm going to miss this feeling most. As the contractions begin to hurt, I grow in excitement for the moment when you will be in my arms! I love you sweet Ezra. Daddy loves you! Now, come and meet us whenever you are ready! We are waiting!