Family

I am so thankful for my family. I'm thankful for how they each have unique personalities, how honest and transparent they are. How they can drive you completely mad and still be incredibly loveable. How they communicate and share their emotions. How they are predictable and how they are able to completely surprise you. How we can laugh, cry, scream, repeat. 

My family is a melting pot of traits, quirks and incredible generosity and compassion that I'm struggling to be so far away from. 

My hope for the future is that my children will play in my parents back yard, enjoy sleepovers with cousin Caleb, sail with papa, eat nanas banana pudding and of course be little bulldawgs!

  

Tales of mommy hood...

I'm pretty sure I've faced more situations over the course of the last 19 months than I ever thought imaginable! 

Just this week... We are dog sitting for our Langhoff friends while they are out of town. Abby is a sweet dog but usually has a bell that hangs from the door that she rings to let you know she has "business to take care of..." Well, her bell didn't make the trip with her so we hit a snag on her first day with us. It was that moment as a mom that I was experiencing pure bliss... Ezra was playing quietly by himself giving me a quiet moment for myself. This doesn't happen too often so I went to check on him and low and behold, Ezra was playing with what I thought were "rocks." Turns out they were not rocks but Abby turd pellets. Now I bet you can guess my reaction, but sadly you are probably mistaken. I didn't freak out but calmly inspected his mouth to see if he had mistaken the "rocks" for brownies. Not this time. 

We washed Ezra's hands, left the toy for dad to clean up...(dad handles all poop situations)...and carried on with our day. 

Why so calm? This isn't our first run in with dog poop. We have had two previous dog poop incidents which sadly led us to relocate our yorkie back to Georgia. Fool me once...

And as tales of mommy hood go, we have other poop tales that are sure to make a non-parent gag. Just recently our Houdini baby had taken off his diaper in order to check to make sure his manhood was still there... Boys will be boys... Ezra, again, playing quietly while I washed dishes, calmly approached me with something black on his fingers. Always aware that we could have run into a poop situation and knowing Ezra hates dirty hands I immediately washed his hands and went in search of the mystery substance. I located said substance in the middle of the living room hardwood floor! Not the dog. Ezra had relieved himself without his diaper on the hardwood! So thankful our home is wall to wall hardwood! Again, this is gross no matter who you are, but has become a part of my life. I could write endless blogs about the poop that has filled my days as a parent, but I'll save some for another time. 

I hope you weren't eating while reading this today. I was eating a bagel and drinking coffee while typing this out. Shows you how parenthood changes you!  

Lastly, there should be some universal law out there that pregnant women should NEVER have to deal with poop, child, dog, etc. I can sheepishly admit to losing my lunch on Ezra during several diaper changes early in my first trimester. 

...oh the joys of baby making/raising...

Working on thankfulness

Some days I question going back to work. I think about the benefits of going back into the world of business. I think about how working would allow for me to have something of my own, somewhere to channel my education, my nature to work hard, ambition that has gone slightly stale, social networking with coworkers, possibly being in the car by myself, dressing for work in real clothes not covered with breakfast, lunch, snack, snot and dinner. I think about how going back to work would allow for the new car that I think about, new clothes on the spur of the moment, extravagant vacations or just an overnighter away from the norm, pedicures, expansive food budget, dates nights, the ability to schedule a babysitter and pay them well!! And then I look at my little man who just fell down and only wanted mamma to snuggle until his booboo stopped hurting. I think about how I get the privilege of napping with this little guy everyday, of watching him smile, learn new words, drive me crazy, pee and poop a million times a day and give me endless kisses and hugs. I could go to work and possibly buy our first home, shorten my husbands work commute or I can work on being content, teach Ezra the abcs, cuddle our baby on the way and learn to live on less. I can dream and hope for a time to take our kids to Disneyland, get that car someday, have freedom to buy whatever I want whenever I want.... Or I can enjoy each day with these Fekkes kids, teach them the value of being thankful and snuggle until they are snuggled out.  Because the truth is I want to be here each day with them. I want to change the endless diapers, scrub endless stains, count to 10 during each tantrum, and take every kiss and hug.