E is not asleep

It is 2:44 AM, E is not asleep...and neither am I! For the most part, we have a sweet little baby that prizes sleep, but some nights, he is determined to explore his new world in the wee hours of the morning. We have had 2 seriously bad nights since bringing home E, the kind where Derek and I both are wondering if we can really handle this parenting thing. Tonight isn't one of "those" nights. Tonight, E is just wide awake after a feeding and refusing to let those precious little eyelids close. Sometimes he does this. He tries so hard to stay awake and he succeeds inbetween feedings. I, on the other hand, do not handle this staying awake business as gracefully as E does.

So, here are some mommy and daddy highlights:
-Daddy loves when he can quiet E down all on his own (without me having to nurse E).
-Daddy actually got E to hold on to his pacifier for 30 minutes...this is 29 minutes and 59 seconds longer than E has taken to it previously.
-Mommy figured out a cry cue...E's just rub my back cue when he is crying in his Moses basket.
-In one day, E went through 10 outfits...in 20 minutes, he went through 3 diapers, in 10 minutes mommy was both peed and puked on!
-Mom and Dad managed to clean the ENTIRE house while E took his morning nap. I mean we seriously scrubbed the bathroom, washed all of the sheets, caught up on laundry, put away all of E's clothes, found some that we didn't know we even had, etc.
-We took E on his first official outing in public (instead of to the doctor's office). Of course it was to Five Guys for a burger. E sat in his car seat while mommy and daddy ate delicious burgers. He was a very sweet baby for his first dinner out!

E's highlights:
-He finally realized there is a mirror above him in his swing. Now he enjoys staring at himself!

Day 15 - Life and Times of E.

 Yes, he is adorable! I am that bragging parent that absolutely ADORES their child! Yesterday, for wake time, E and I played on his baby Einstein playmat. Fun times to be had!

 This is E's, "Mom, really, another picture?" face!

 And this is one of my favorite faces of little E. He opens his eyes as wide as they will go and puckers his lips. We call this the turtle face! You can see his stork bite/angel kiss pretty well in this picture.

 And this is a newborn outfit that you can see still doesn't fit. I wish baby clothes sizes were universal! But, sadly, a newborn outfit from Target might or might not fit. Crazy!

 How precious is this baby? Such a special gift. We love this little guy so much and are so thankful that God blessed us as his parents!

 MELT MY HEART!

AND the BEST face of the week goes to: E! This is the "plank." Yes, our child planks. He stretches out his arms and legs, stretches out his neck, puckers his lips and opens his eyes! So cute! And yes, we were testing out the stocking photo op.

Pumpkin

 December 21, 2012 - My little pumpkin sleeping soundly after a very sleepless night. Mommy and daddy were overwhelmed by Ezra's decision to stay awake for 6 hours straight. Normally a good sleeper, last night was a whopper of a night.

 Ezra's stocking came in the mail. Derek consider's it a "boot." It is so cute and features an adorable E.L.F. Thanks Nana for the stocking!

 Merry Christmas from the Fekkes' - Derek, Anlee and Ezra!

 "This is my sinister look!" 

 "Mug shot" 

 Our sweet little pumpkin. 

This was Ezra's outfit to visit the pediatrician on ...whatever day we went... Aren't the dino booties sooo cute! Ezra's mom loves dinosaurs so Ezra has quite the wardrobe to match!

Again, Ezra wins as cutest little guy in the world! We love this little guy.

My Husband - preacher and blogger

Derek has reentered the blogging world. He has started a new blog where he is posting his thoughts on the Gospel.  His desire is to make the Gospel true not just in his head, but also in his heart for the GLORY of GOD. I love hearing my husband's thoughts. I love seeing him work out his salvation daily through his devotionals and study of God's word. I love that God blessed him and us in allowing Derek to become a student of the Gospel through ReTrain, Derek's seminary coursework. I love that he is so willing to share his thoughts for the good of others and God's glory.

At my suggestion, Derek isn't going to sit down and "blog," but instead he will use his blog as a place to share things he has already worked through. Papers he has written for class, sermons he has prepared for church, lessons he has put together for Sunday school, etc. SO, CHECK. OUT. HIS. BLOG. and draw closer to Jesus. (Click on the link below to get to Derek's blog.)

GOD'S GLORY man's joy

Baby Ezra

 Okay, so yes, we are obsessed with baby Ezra! He is the sweetest little sweetheart! Every little face and coo just brings a smile to our faces. We could not thank God enough for blessing us with such a sweet little guy. Daily, our prayer, is that we would love him and honor him as a gift from our Father, and enjoy each moment we have together. AND take many many pictures!! The picture above is day three of Ezra's life and my favorite daddy/son picture. I love seeing Derek hold his baby boy. Seeing how they are together has caused me to love my husband that much more deeply. Thanks to Nancy, Ezra had some clothes that fit him in the picture above. Poor little guy is too small for newborn clothes right now, or at least some brands of newborn. Baby clothes are NOT universally sized.

 My little pumpkin! Love him so much! He is so peaceful when he sleeps. And when he opens those bright blue eyes, it makes all of the sleep deprivation go away.

 This is before we started the bath. Ezra is still calm and collected. Next picture, he completely loses it!

 Our baby DOES NOT like cold wet wipes or sponge baths. He is going to be like his momma, steaming hot showers! But, even when he is completely biligerent, he is so adorable.

We are going to have a thumb sucker on our hands!! This little man's safety net is to have his hands near his face at all times, including when he wants to nurse! Speaking of, Sunday was a terrible day. I was sick, feverish feeling, achy all over, nearly passed out in the shower. I was terrified that somehow I managed to catch the flu without having gone outside of our apartment. I called S.L., my sweet mommy friend, and she said, "It's your milk coming in!" AND IT WAS! Woohoo! So thankful that God provided the means in my body to take care of our little guy. BUT, what a way to go about it :)

Lastly, I'm making a public statement about the awesomeness that is my husband. He has been absolutely amazing since the birth of our son. First, looking back at pictures of our delivery, in every single picture you can see Derek praying for me and Ezra. I heard his prayers, but seeing them is so special. Second, this man GLADLY changes a diaper to spend time with his son. Third, sometimes he looks at me and realizes that I need some extra rest right at the moment and no matter how tired he is, he sends me off to bed. He cooks, he cleans, he works...he is such an amazing man and a beautiful father. Hearing him talk to Ezra, kiss his little cheeks, rock and walk a fussy baby...so yes, I'm blessed with two of the most amazing men!

Ezra L.

Yes, HE IS HERE! Our E.L.F. arrived on December 11, 2012, at 9:32AM. And while his birth is fresh in my mind, I'm going share...

Nine months ago God blessed us with the knowledge of a child. We were thrilled, elated, overwhelmed, amazed! Nine months is a long time and I guess most soon-to-be-parents entertain thoughts of what labor might be like. Not really for us. I never thought about labor. I knew that it would hurt, but it would be temporary and then we would have a baby in our arms. I never feared labor. And at 40 weeks pregnant I was so completely ready for the experience to begin.

On December 10th, at 2:00am, Ezra's due date, I began having contractions. I had been having Braxton Hicks for weeks, but these were "different." These, I recognized immediately for what they were. REAL labor. I was so excited I couldn't sleep! I waited almost three hours before waking Derek, or rather before the pain of my contractions woke Derek up. His response to me was, "I really need to sleep. I don't feel good." He didn't feel good, but I felt contractions coming on stronger and I was dancing with joy. They became painful pretty quick and somewhat regular at 10-15 minutes apart. By morning, we knew that Derek was sick. I called Nancy. She brought him medicine immediately and her husband took Derek to the doctor. He didn't get in to see the doctor, but immediately came back home and went to bed. I settled onto the couch to count contractions. I remember at one point cleaning the house and organizing the cleaning supplies under the sick. I did some last minute laundry and later Derek woke up. Contractions were getting stronger. We had been talking with the midwife and she wanted me to wait to come in until contractions were 4-5 minutes part for an hour. By evening I had cabin fever so we went out for dinner. We walked into Jason's Deli and I had several contractions while fixing my salad at the bar. Fun times for those around us. After we went to the mall to walk. It was a cold night here so inside walking worked best. What doesn't work is having to stop walking to breathe through a contraction. We had to leave and go home and "rest."

Rest does not come easily to a laboring woman. A few more hours went by and I was in so much pain I got sick. I couldn't sit, lay down or walk through contractions. The only comfort was to stand in the shower under the hot water. Derek diligently timed each contractions, attempted to do counter pressure and watch as I was in pain. At 2 he called Kelli, our midwife and said he felt like we should come in even thought we weren't 5 minutes apart consistently. 30 minutes later we were at the birth center and I was measuring 7cm dilated. The midwife said, "why did you wait so long to come in?" WOW! I wanted to scream!

I labored on a workout ball for a while and Derek laid down for a nap. Three hours later I had not moved from a 7 so we decided to break my water. Kelli said things would become intense fast after my water broke. She told the truth. I was on my hands and knees screaming to get in the tub so I could have this baby. Derek was a superstar, holding my hand, massaging my back, praying in my ear. It took a long time to fill the tub, but then I waddled in and begin transition. Two hours later I was only an 8. AND IN PAIN! I was so exhausted at this point that I was falling asleep between contractions. I kept asking if it was time to push and the response was no. You need to get up and move around. After many squats in the tub and what I would consider maternity contortions, I had such a strong contraction that my body naturally pushed...and...then...life...changed. Pushing became my sole focus. Derek held my hands the entire time. He prayed in my ear and encouraged me with each push. I pushed for over an hour and still no baby. Kelli kept saying, he's right there. You just have to push. I ended up having to get out of the tub and on the bed to push more. I still couldn't push Ezra out there. I was beyond exhuasted. So, Derek sat down on the birthing pool steps and I squated inbetween his legs. I set a goal in my head to push Ezra out in three pushes. More like 30. But, in time, Ezra started to crown. Those last pushes were both the hardest and the easiest. The moment Ezra came into this world, all the pain stopped and all the love rushed in. He was immediately put on my chest and Derek cradled us in his arms. Sweetest moment ever. The other details of our natural birth are for another time, but the end result will always be the same. God gifted us with the most precious baby boy. Our son was born at 9:32AM, 6.1lbs, 19"long. We love him so much and are honored to be his parents.

Our First Borns

Christmas parade in Midland

 Daddy Fekkes is growing his man beard this year. I love it. AND, we are aware that no-shave-Movember is over, but now he is growing it in protest of Ezra's possibly late arrival. I like to think he looks Scottish with his red beard!!!

Our sweet "L" family. We love these two. Sweetest couple. Sweetest parents. Sweetest grandparents! Sweetest friends!!!

Okay, so maybe we've "BOTH" put on some weight since our first photo in front of a tree three years ago (WOW!), but I'm going with it looks good on us! A man standing next to us asked when we were due. We told him in two days and he had a face of utter shock. He asked me what we were doing out?!? My first response would have been, "what else are we supposed to do?" But, I wasn't quick enough with an answer. Derek just laughed it off. Later in the grocery store, the man behind us in the checkout line said, "...The baby is due in January." I said, "The baby is due tomorrow." He said, "Ohh, a Sagittarius! Great, strong month. He will be a baby Jimmy Hendrix." He then proceeded to recount for us every great musician born in the month of December off the top of his head. People say weird things to pregnant women, for sure!

Daddy's Photo Shoot

 We realized on December 8, 2012, two days before the due date of our son, that we did not have a SINGLE picture of the "three" of us. So, daddy and I took some pictures today and wanted to share with our family and friends.

 I love this picture. Yes, it is a selfie, but I LOVE THIS PICTURE. I can't wait to see Derek hold his son in his hands.

 Here is the top view bump...crazy...

 Love Daddy's heart hands.

 Ignoring my also pregnant chin, I like the side view of the bump.

 Lovin' the beard!

 I love daddy's smile! and baby's outie right now.

Hopefully our last photo until baby joins us!

A little bit of everything

• I'm 39 weeks pregnant, five days from due date, measuring 32 weeks pregnant. 
• Ezra weighs about 7 lbs. 
• I have frequent contractions but nothing regular yet. Today's contractions were by far the most painful, but still not that painful. Maybe I have a high tolerance for pain? Maybe I have back contractions unlike abdomen contractions?
• Ezra received a very sweet Lenox "baby's first Christmas ornament" from his great-grandparents, papa and Jo.  
• My water partially broke this past Saturday. It was considered a small leak, but nothing to worry about. However, telling Derek that my water broke was fun and memorable. No "freak out" on his part. 
• The stockings are hung by the chimney with care...in hopes that Ezra soon will be here! 
• Every night I dream that my water breaks, contractions come strong and we leave for the birthing center. Everything is packed and ready to go!
• I have not bought a SINGLE Christmas gift this year! Not a SINGLE one. So forgive me if gifts and Christmas cards go out after the new year. 

Hope you all are having a merry and blessed holiday season. Can't wait to share Ezra with you!

11 days...or any day

11 days before we stare at a big "0 days to go" sign! Can't believe we are so close to the end, but I'm feeling it. Hence, a blog post at 5:30 in the morning. Too much heartburn after too much Mexican food = miserable momma!

BRAG ALERT:

Daddy Fekkes is the sweetest guy!

Daddy Fekkes bought Mommy Fekkes a big, beautiful camera as a "push present/Christmas present!" 

And Mommy Fekkes is very, very thankful!!

I'm excited and looking forward to capturing those "gone in the blink of an eye" moments with baby boy, (who is busy moving around like an alien child as I type.) 

Lastly, I have a dog story...

I overheard Derek talking to his dog, Brady, tonight. He said, "Brady, your mom has now thrown up on you and dropped a knife full of peanut butter on your head. I might stay away from her if I were you." I asked Derek what Brady's response to this was...He gave me a sideways head shake. :)

Dear Ezra

As your "birth day" draws near, I'm feeling nostalgic about our time together over the last 9 months. I remember so sweetly the day we took not one, but five pregnancy tests to confirm what we already knew. I remember kneeling at the alter Easter Sunday praying about the possibility of you and feeling in my heart our prayer already answered. We stopped to buy a test, I took it, I came running out with a smile on my face. Your daddy and I loaded up your puppy brothers and went back for more tests. All YES! Later that evening Daddy held mommy as she cried her eyes out at the amazingness of knowing that already you were growing inside of me.

Two days later, mommy celebrated her 26th birthday. We joke that Daddy gave me you as the best birthday present ever! We called your grandparents. Nana cried and starred at us. Oma and Opa's eyes grew big! Friends and family celebrated and rejoiced at the news.

We had to wait 12 weeks before we heard your heartbeat. Hearing the sound, daddy and mommy grabbed each other's hands and just said a prayer of thanksgiving. Your heart beating was the most beautiful sound. Seeing you move on the sonogram was life changing, overwhelming, captivating!

At 16 weeks we had a scare on a bad lab test. Knowing that you could be affected by my immunity to rubella caused us to fully rely on the goodness and faithfulness of God. He brought us through our fear and we know that on the day we meet you, He will have claimed victory over your health.

At 17 weeks, Daddy and mommy needed to get out of Midland, so we drove two hours to Lubbock just to get away. On the way home, mommy's stomach hurt so bad. Once at home again, we laid in bed and YOU KICKED! You moved and I knew it was YOU! Our sweet boy! Every time you moved I would grab your dad's hand, put it on my stomach, and then you would calm down. You were elusive to your dad for a few more weeks. At this point we always called you "our little one."

At 20 weeks, on your dad's 29th birthday, we had a 3d/4d ultrasound. We saw you move! We saw you touch your toes, give us a thumbs up and wiggle and giggle. We also DIDN'T see rubella!! Praise God!

At 21 weeks we opened a box on the beach on Camano and celebrated our SON! Blue balloons flew into the sky and daddy and mommy said another prayer of Thanksgiving for our baby boy. Your name, Ezra Liam Fekkes, written in the sand and on our hearts. I wanted a boy! I'm so thankful for you.

As we neared 29 weeks, my fears about losing you evaporated! You were viable! We were thankful!

At 32 weeks, Mommy took you to Georgia for time with friends and family. You were rubbed like Buddha by your many aunts and your cousin Caleb. You received so many beautiful gifts and you ate really good Mexican food! Also at this point, we discovered an issue with mommy's sugar. But, like everything else, we gave it to God. You, sweet boy, are going to be perfect on your birth day.

Now, at 37 weeks and 5 days pregnant, I'm looking back and remembering each day with you. Despite months of morning sickness, I wouldn't trade a single day with you. I've loved having you grow, move, kick and turn inside of me. I'm going to miss this feeling most. As the contractions begin to hurt, I grow in excitement for the moment when you will be in my arms! I love you sweet Ezra. Daddy loves you! Now, come and meet us whenever you are ready! We are waiting!

Nesting & Nursery - update

The nursery is coming along. Finally found a spread for the bed, pillows and packed the diaper bag! Just need a bedskirt. 

My nook! Still need to frame the invitations from my baby shower, but added beautiful curtains, the lamp and made a pillow for my great-grandmothers rocking chair! 

We took the closet door off to open up the space, organized the changing table, stocked the diaper basket and folded all 1,298 burp clothes and receiving blankets! 

Better view of the closet, changing table and crib. 

So, the nursery is coming along thanks in large part to Natalie, Nancy and Sarah L. All of Ezra's clothes are organized, separated by size, gently washed and folded and ready for a baby to fill them out! The closet is tidy thanks to Natalie and her super organized brain. The diaper bag is packed and ready to go, as is Mom and Dad's birthing center bag. The only thing left is waiting for baby...and the waiting is starting to get uncomfortable. Braxton Hicks contractions are starting to hurt more. The tightening of my entire bump lasting for 30+ seconds is a new sensation this week! But, one that is welcome because we know it is a short time now before we meet Ezra. I think I actually made my first "contraction face" today! This is so REAL! I'm so thankful for Thanksgiving! I've been able to REST, prepare for Ezra's arrival, spend an amazing week with Natalie and spend time with the amazing Langhoff family. Derek and I even went on a double date with S & B! Adult conversation, mommy talk and daddy (theology) talk all in one evening! We are such a blessed and growing family! Now, baby...COME OUT!!

Nesting & Natalie

Ornaments Aunt Natters and I made for Nat's birthday and Ezra's Christmas

So, Aunt Natalie came out to Midland this past Saturday to visit Derek and I and to help us prepare for the baby! Oh man, we accomplished so much in such a short amount of time. Natalie helped unpack from the baby shower my church hosted for us, (amazing, pictures when I get them,). She organized all of Ezra's clothes in the closet by size and she kept me on track and on my "list" of things to buy to make our transition into parenthood easy and stress-free. I'm so thankful for our few short days together. Nat is better at taking pictures than I am so here are some of her's from her trip to Midland...

Scottie Boo and our mini-tree. 

Ezra's baby ornament

The biggest tourist attraction...

Aunt Natter's with Brady Bear. 

Things we checked off my list: 

Curtains for the babies room.

Take closet door off to make more space for baby things.

Organize all clothes.

Pack hospital bag.

Bedspread for guest bed in baby's room.

Check off last minute registry needs. 

WASH everything!

Set up Christmas decorations BEFORE baby comes! 

So thankful for Natters! We had so much fun together! AND, we managed some great girl time with the lovely Sarah L. and Nancy L. Having an all-out girls shop-a-thon at 37 weeks pregnant was the best part! Game night, great food and having my best friend spend time with my husband = one very successful week!